It's not often I'm the most sober and well-dressed bloke in town, but that was the case when I swaggered into Bundaberg, a remote Queensland outpost built on alcoholism and liver failure. The locals love getting hammered so much they named the joint after their favourite booze, Bundy Rum, a throat-burning syrup which doubles as … Continue reading The City Built on Alcoholism: Bundaberg, Queensland
My girlfriend is Brazilian, so whenever I do something stupid and she starts yelling at me, I don't have a clue what she's saying because I don't speak Portuguese. It's always "small penis" this and "useless fucking dickhead" that, which makes no sense to me because I don't understand the language. So, in an effort … Continue reading Balls-out in Setúbal
Santa Catarina, in the luscious south of Brazil, has so many beaches that you'd go mad if you tried to drink a beer on even a quarter of them in your lifetime. So when it came to organising a romantic weekend away, I allowed my Brazilian lady friend to choose the destination. She has fantastic … Continue reading Praia do Rosa: It’s bloomin’ good!
Celebrities such as Paris Hilton, Marky Mark and Paul 'Fatty' Vautin flock to Punta del Este each summer like flies to shit. The beaches are packed with bronzed bodies and the nightclubs are pulsing with techno music. Uruguay's second city is one of the world's great party spots, so I was surprised when I rocked … Continue reading Punta del Este is the best(e)
If there's a more inspirational film than the 1991 classic Thelma & Louise, I'm yet to see it. The tale of two lesbians who smoke some poor bloke and then travel all over the place in a fancy car before driving it off a cliff provides lessons that we should all live by. Also, Geena … Continue reading Thelma and Louise Go Flying
Women call me lots of things, from the West Gosford Wildcat to "Hey you in the bushes!" to names that aren't fit to print in a family friendly blog such as Drunk and Jobless. But the most common name is The Mauritius Delicious, due to the fact that I have Mauritian heritage and am very … Continue reading Putting the Delicious into Mauritius