My one year and one week anniversary of being drunk and jobless

Exactly one year and one week ago, I received the greatest gift a man could ever hope for. No, not a blowjob off all four remaining members of One Direction some hot chick with big tits, I'm talking about my redundancy from the evil empire of Bauer Media. It was a pay-off that not only … Continue reading My one year and one week anniversary of being drunk and jobless

Going, Goa, Gone

I'm sitting here on the sand, watching the waves roll in under the moonlight, sipping on my last beer before heading back to Australia tomorrow morning. I've spent six weeks in Indonesia, Myanmar and India, six weeks that have felt like a lifetime and as if they would never end, but which are now just … Continue reading Going, Goa, Gone

A monk gets dunked

After the nine-hour trip from Yangon to Bagan, I never wanted to ride on another bus again. But there I was, two days later, climbing on the Bagan Minn Thar Express once again to make the return journey, this time overnight. And it wasn’t too bad, actually - for me, at least. There was a … Continue reading A monk gets dunked

Things to do in Bagan when you’re dead

Today was a day that I probably didn't need to spend in Bagan. I saw a bunch of temples yesterday, and didn't have a burning urge to see any more today, but I'm stuck here till 8pm, so what did I do? I looked at temples and got drunk. Shit, it's Bagan, it's not like … Continue reading Things to do in Bagan when you’re dead

I broke a poor person’s bike and blamed it on a monk

Bagan has more temples than Rebel Wilson has had meat pies. 2200 in fact (thanks, Wikipedia). And today I saw all of them… except for the 2100 I missed out on because I went to the pub. But there’s not a massive amount of variety between them, so I think I got a pretty good … Continue reading I broke a poor person’s bike and blamed it on a monk

Stuck in the middle of Myanmar with you

Yesterday I got my first taste of Yangon and found it to be pretty ace, and today I wanted to dig a little deeper and check out some of the stuff outside the central business district. In some ways it was like going to bed with a decent sort and waking up the next day … Continue reading Stuck in the middle of Myanmar with you

Mission of Burma (that’s when I reach for my Myanmar Lager)

I expected Myanmar to be extremely poor, backwards and run-down, but have been surprised to discover that the city of Yangon is a modern, progressive place that is a joy to walk around and overloaded with things to see and do. The streets are wide, with plenty of trees and footbaths big enough to actually … Continue reading Mission of Burma (that’s when I reach for my Myanmar Lager)

Ladyboys, hookers and muggings; going back in time in Thailand

I’ve managed to do what those gronks Andrew Chan and Myuran ‘Suck a man off’ Sukumaran thankfully never will - make it out of Indonesia alive. I’m telling you, those three days I spent in Jakarta seemed more like a month, and if my flight out had been delayed I reckon I would’ve started throwing … Continue reading Ladyboys, hookers and muggings; going back in time in Thailand

I’d rather drink shit than spend another day in Jakarta

Sorry, Huddersfield, you've been replaced as the worst place I've ever visited. All hail Jakarta, Indonesia, a filthy, noisy hellhole that is as pretty and interesting as the contents of Clive Palmer's toilet the morning after a pie-eating competition. Let this stand as a warning to anyone thinking about coming here for a holiday - … Continue reading I’d rather drink shit than spend another day in Jakarta