The Tour of Annecy

"Put your clothes on and get the fuck out of my house! And please remove my turnip strainer from your anus!" Just another day in the home on paragliding, Annecy, France. I opened my eyes to see a very bashful, very naked Hamster hurriedly throwing his clothes into his bag. His arms and legs were … Continue reading The Tour of Annecy

Anarchy in Annecy

Wild horses couldn't have dragged me away from Brazil's welcoming bosom, but there was one thing that could lure me away - the promise of a few weeks of sublime paragliding above the Alps with Hamster. So I packed my G-string away, skolled my last bottle of Brahma, and hopped on a plane to France. … Continue reading Anarchy in Annecy

73 or 74 reasons to visit Russia

The mission to Moscow is over and I'm back in a country where I can walk down the street without being questioned by the cops or attacked by some vodka-guzzling nutter in an imitation Adidas tracksuit. Here are a whole bunch of reasons why you should visit this most unusual country (or, if you enjoy … Continue reading 73 or 74 reasons to visit Russia

Armed and Dangerous

Let's face it, the Russians love to have a good fight. Whether it's a war against the Western world or a backyard scrap between two boozed-up homeless blokes, these proud Slavic people are always getting stuck into someone. Moscow's Central Armed Forces Museum serves as a tribute to their history of hurting people, and has … Continue reading Armed and Dangerous

Nightmare at the Mausoleum

Everybody likes looking at dead bodies - it's one of life's simple pleasures. Sure, you wouldn't want to see a rotting corpse climbing out of a grave while you're walking home late at night, or catch one rooting your missus, but it's usually a lot of fun to have a squiz at someone who isn't … Continue reading Nightmare at the Mausoleum

The Fortress in the Sky

Europe is know for a lot of things; beautiful scenery, wonderful beer,deliciously unhealthy food and gorgeous women who don't need a lot of convincing to take off their clothes in public. One thing Europe's not known for is massive fuck-off buildings, with cities around here prefering to have lovely little opera houses and thousand-year-old huts … Continue reading The Fortress in the Sky

Show me the monastery!

The Russians are a religious bunch. Well, you'd be pretty open-minded to stories about mystical beings and reincarnated zombies if you spent 25 hours a day pissed off your head. For this reason, the Federation is home to some of the most exquisite churches this side of Samoa, and none of them are prettier than … Continue reading Show me the monastery!

Cemetery Man – Exploring Moscow’s Incredible Graveyards

There are more than 13 million people in Moscow, and sooner or later every single one of them is going to cark it. Of course, with the amount of vodka the Russians guzzle, they'll leave a bunch of well-preserved corpses, but all those bodies have to go somewhere. Not surprisingly, you can't swing a lynx … Continue reading Cemetery Man – Exploring Moscow’s Incredible Graveyards

Out of this World: The Moscow Cosmonaut Museum and how I chose love over the opportunity to be crowned King of the Universe

The 1960s were known for two things; spunky hippies who did heaps of drugs and fucked everyone in sight, and the epic space race between the USA and the USSR. The spunky hippies are now saggy grandmothers, but at least the history of Societ space travel has been well preserved, thanks to Moscow's Memorial Museum … Continue reading Out of this World: The Moscow Cosmonaut Museum and how I chose love over the opportunity to be crowned King of the Universe

Drunk Lives Matter: A visit to Sokolniki Park and my experiences as a victimised minority in Russia

All I wanted was to spend a sunny Autumn day exploring one of Russia's most famous and beautiful parks. What I ended up with was a heavy dose of victimisation, racial profiling and police prejudice that should have social activists in an uproar. This is the harrowing story of my adventures through Moscow as one … Continue reading Drunk Lives Matter: A visit to Sokolniki Park and my experiences as a victimised minority in Russia